We all try to survive in this cruel world

Life is unfair.

But since everyone thinks life is unfair, isn't that make life fair?

Life's fair at being unfair.

How peculiar and cheeky life is. 

So, at the beginning of this post I tried to summon a cryptic side of me to write an essay on how men put everything at stake just to survive in this temporary world. How us, mortals, challenge and defy gravity, just to be able to stand tall and be the last winner. But why write something so obvious?

What I'm trying to say is, at times we tend to over think things. Like now, I'm in the middle of writing my thesis proposal. I keep forcing my brain to find absolute answer to every question people might pose. Believe me, when everything you do in your spare time is sitting quietly in front of your macbook, and type, you'll feel guilty even in your sleep. you feel sinful everytime you take a break and do a me-time. At least that's what I feel right now. I feel like my thesis is chasing me anywhere I go, unless I sit idly, and finish my job. My mind is rarely at ease. Now you see why life gets tiring. I'm tired of running. I wanna rest. But I can't. I'm not supposed to. Not until the whole chapter of my uni life  is finished. When's that, you ask? I expect it to be over in August. 

I'm afraid I'll have a serious, permanent mental breakdown if everything I've done comes to a waste. At this point, failure is what can break me. At this point, failure, is something I clearly cannot tolerate. 

At this point, I've come to a decision. I will not over-think things. I will stop imagining the worst-case scenario that can happen in the next few months and start imagining only the best-case scenarios. 

This is my defense mechanical. This is the modus operandi I use to survive the cruel world. We all try, right? Finding the best way, wearing our best armor and wielding enemies. Hmm. Life has an interesting narrative.